Its been a long long time since my last post.. Got busy with a few presentation and emergency duties…
Well this topic is not very ‘enlightening’!
To begin with the story, I met Sam (not the real name, of course!) when I was working last year. He was senior to me. The day I met him I was blown away. Not by his looks, by his personality, intelligence, style, nature and yes his looks. Sam has that kind of effect on everyone around him.
To me he was a greek god, whom I admired relentlessly. And hello! I am a Leo, headstrong and not so easily impressed! Also I am 29, so not so dreamy about guys. And to top it off I was in a relationship with a guy I love to death.
All my colleagues used to surround him every single day to chat about patients and everything else. And I desperately wanted to be a part of that group. I tried to initial resist the charms, but eventually gave in. People used to often ask me as to why do I blush around him, but then every female did the same. Oh god when he used to walk in the hospital every morning, so radiant, with a big smile on his face. On rounds, he used to teach us and explain all our doubts. He was the only person interested and capable of teaching us. So basically I admired him.
And sadly he left our hospital in 4 months. That was the last I would see of him. We bid him farewell with a heavy heart.
So then it began. We started texting each other. Just normal routine stuff like hospital gossips initially, later our likes dislikes. I didn’t quite realize when I developed an attraction towards him. To be very honest it was more of an intellectual attraction more than physical. I started texting him more often and he reciprocated as well. He began sending me his pictures and I bombarded him with compliments. He did reveal a little bit of his emotional side as well. I was happy to have him talk to me on a daily basis.
And then suddenly it stopped. Like it just came to a halt. I was puzzled. I was too proud to text him and ask. I was too proud to ask an explanation. I tried to forget him. But to be very honest he was stuck in my mind. He was always there in the background.
After a few months he spoke to me on social media, and these thoughts just came all back to me. Why did he stop talking? Why do I have this insane attraction even after 9 months? Why do I obsessively keep checking his social media?
I am not in love with him and I am sure of that. All I need is some closure….